he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
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so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
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I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize