she was so not down for the gang bang
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
