hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
