Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
