Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
