My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize