are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize