your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
