I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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