You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
