i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Randomize
