yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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