I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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