U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
