I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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