I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
wow bdsm is so cute
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
