have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
