Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
