it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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