Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
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