so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
