It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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