God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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