So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
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I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
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He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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