just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
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