so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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