some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
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I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
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I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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