Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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