I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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