I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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