A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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