I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
