Don't make out with my wife yet
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
