he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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