We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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