I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
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