Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
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