dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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