can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
