Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
