You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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