Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
My ass is underappreciated
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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