Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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