I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
i came on her dog
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize
