Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
