if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
