hell yes lets make some ravioli
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I feel like a drive thru vagina
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize