So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
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