I think I am morally bankrupt
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.