im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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