Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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