Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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