so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Randomize
