so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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